Learn The Hard Way

This college thing is more time consuming than I had thought. I now have less time to play games, orkutting, chatting, facebooking and doing nothing. So when the weekend comes I go all the way. Finished the game Prototype an hour ago and got bored already. So here I am typing away like I'm writing record due tomorrow but the difference is, this doesn't have a deadline but I have the duty of satisfying my fans who are now less than the number of fingers in my hand if both my hands are cut. So without further ado, as I promised you, I'll introduce my lecturers and professors.

No, not all of them, just the ones who deserve to be mentioned. Personally I think everyone in my college is a egocentric weirdos who don't even have the least bit of decency not to scratch their balls in front of female staff but there are some weirdos who can cause more damage than sleeping gas with their teaching skills. They are,

The Dumb Bums

I had great expectations from this guy who teaches me Dynamics. He's an author of many books which students actually like, not the usual copy-from-the-standard-text shit. Now this guy walks into the class room and everybody is like standing up and a good friend of mine just had to laugh after hearing a joke. The prof doesn't even bother greeting us with a customary good morning, he calls out to my friend, referring to him by the word which is the Tamil equivalent of "waste-land". I wasn't impressed. Turns out that the word was his favourite.

Then there is this guy who teaches me Gas dynamics. His problem wasn't his language, his problem was his mouth. He can't stop talking something as if its some kind of an obsession. In the name of recalling the previous day's stuff he repeats the same thing for a week. We were going no where with this guy.

Then comes the guy who tops them all. His was a problem of completely different sort. He graduated from the IIT with a degree in Chemistry. It was probably Fate's dark hand that threw him in this college but he seemed to enjoy every moment of teaching. The only problem was that we weren't. Actually most of us don't know whatever that goes on in his class because we will be sleeping. I try to avoid sleeping in his classes(not that I love to hear his lecture, I don't sleep in class because it disrupts my sleep-wake cycle), but since it is so difficult I try to distract myself from sleeping. This was how : instead of taking notes, I noted down every mistake he makes in his pronunciation. These are some samples :

"Forests act as a large sponse(sponge) absorbing all the rainwater".

A student irritated him very much and he decided to flaunt his knowledge :

"I have laand(learned) more than you".

He's probably a rich landlord from the country. The other day he was explaining the blue baby syndrome :

"Even the footus(foetus) gets affected".

Some other day he was explaining the dangers or using pesticides :

"Some pesticides affect both tarjet(target) as well as non-tarjet organisms".

The same day he was explaining how burning fossil fuels affect the environment :

"Banning(burning) of fossil fuels lead to pollution".

And how could I forget today???

"Deforestation leads to degrees(decrease) of rainfall".

God I feel sick already. Look I'll be honest with you, I didn't graduate from the Oxford with a literature degree but no one has to be to speak good English. Especially its got to be the teachers who have to be careful in these things because they're going to stay in the same college for probably the rest of the eternity but in a few years we will be going places and we don't want to show off in the office meeting what we "laand" in college.

I always thought learning by experience was the hard way and learning through schools and teachers was easy. And in the place where I study, its the other way around.

Ciao

RIP Poovaraghavan, 3rd yr EEE student who lost his life to a dreadful road accident. Loss of life could have been avoided if he was wearing an helmet. Once again it has shown us that a simple precaution like wearing a helmet can make the difference between life and death.

Update

I just got my result! And I passed!! I fucking passed!!!

Eggman Goes to College

And I'm eggman. Hereafter I'll call myself by that name, so don't get confused.

Vacation was over and after that interview debacle there was this college debacle that i couldn't avoid...for 2 yrs and this is the third year.

I've always had a twisted view of college. And I was not to blame. It was Tamil cinema. They always showed students having fun. There wasn't a single scene depicting the amount of studying involved. And even studying is not my problem. Its the rules. None of the movie guys wore formals. Most of them had pony tails, french beards and piercings. And that created a lasting impression of how college life will be.

Let me tell you a story from my life. Or rather a page from m life story. Back in the day when we wore school uniform and started growing a rudimentary moustache, i.e. the high school days(or rather "daze"), there was more testosterone flowing in our blood than the amount of water our government(TN) gets from Karnataka. As a result most of my classmates (including me) and a few friends were trying to get a girlfriend(bottom line of the matter was that no one was successful but that was a different issue). After an unpleasant experience I reached a conclusion that my attempts at getting a girlfriend were futile(since most of the girls in my school placed themselves above Aishwarya Rai and thought that they were too good for us even though the fish vendor in my street looks better than them), and even if i did manage to get a girlfriend, school was just too early to make a commitment. So I gave up the womanhunt. One of my friends was really disappointed with my decision(he wasn't a quitter, unlike me) and asked me what better place was there to get a girlfriend than the school. Can you guess what my answer was?

"College".

At the end of high school, I guess I maintained my "average" performance which was not going to get me into a good college. Luckily my father came to my rescue with a case full of money. I was going to be an engineer. And where was i going to graduate from?

V for Velammal.

Touted to be one of the best colleges in the city, rumoured to be worse than school. But with my marks I didn't have much of a choice. Something was better than nothing. I didn't know what to expect since most of the guys who made out of the college did so well in their career but they never said a nice thing about the college. In the first week somethings were very clear to me. I've listed them out(it has become a habit since the first list).

1. No, I'm not going to get a girlfriend here.

2. No, I won't have a beard that I longed to have.

3. No, I wasn't going to bunk classes which seemed so easy in the movies.

4. No, I will not have that sense of freedom that school offered so generously.

5. No, wearing an ID card around your neck with a rope is not so cool(feels like a noose).

6. No, my love life is going to be an insignificant footnote in my college life.

and many other conclusions which have too many obscenities that I won't list for the fear of my blog getting flagged. But the whole thing was pretty much fucked up. My master plan for getting a girlfriend crashed and burned. And eggman continues his journey through the land of the barren.

Adventures of eggman will continue. Next time I'll introduce my lecturers and professors to you.

Post how our college life turned out in comments.

Ciao.